You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
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