everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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