"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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