shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
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