youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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