CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
My ass is underappreciated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
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