I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I just cut my nipple shaving
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Randomize
