I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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