I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize