She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize