Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
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