I am puke
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize