I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
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