morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
