Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
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