another moral hangover. fuck.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
