We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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