All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
