how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
