Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize