Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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