i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
