I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
