wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
