Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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