She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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