Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
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This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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