he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
