can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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