I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
