you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
