Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Randomize
