Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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