Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize