Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
