I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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