I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
