I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
