i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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