what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
