i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
