If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
