we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
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he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
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It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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