bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
