Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
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