She's JV to your varsity
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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