he thought i was a dude.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Randomize