sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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