I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize