so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize