i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Randomize
