break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
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