Me. At least after what I've been through.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Randomize